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1. |
Sewer Fuckin'
03:33
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OPEN THE MANHOLE
There’s a perfect place where a party can be
Absolutely crazy dangerous and free
It’s a little gross it doesn’t matter to me
Sewer party BYOB
There’s no fuckin rules underneath the streets
Everybody down there is a nasty freak
Perfect place for all the horny mutants to meet
Sewer party Whip out your D
Blehhhh I think it’s time to find some strange
Something weird something untamed
To make it worth diving through muck
I’ll find something down to fuck
SEWER FUCKIN
No more normal urges nothing else can satisfy
The sewer’s showed me something that I cannot deny
Can’t get off on normal shit, nothing that money buys,
But down here sexy creatures are in ample supply
GET FUCKING GROSS
LETS HAVE A GOOD TIME
ALL I KNOW
IS THAT I AM SLIME
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2. |
Death By Diarrhea
00:38
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Burning hurting painful
Bleeding
Scorching Steaming killer
Shitting
Never ending bloody
Shitfest
Lacerating my
Asshole
Fire eating out my
Anus
Cannot take this pain
no more
Dehydration - fluids
Flushed
Feel my innards start to
Drain
Too much
Can't take
This pain
I want death
Final, fatal
Defecate
This toilet is now my grave!
And I'm dead
SHIT
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3. |
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Late at night drunk as shit after the show
No money left, can't afford to eat on the road
Shed my sweaty clothing - time to sandwich with skill
Mayo, bread, ham and cheese - into my Foreman Grill
Preheat the griddle as I reach for the whiskey
On top of my fridge, unopened full handle
My dick hits the heat, I recoil suddenly
Bottle landing on the grill clamping on my cock!
Rush to freeze my burning dong, I cram it in the ice box
Shut the fridge door on my stick, repeatedly
Panic as the skin breaks, due to the sudden temp change
Shriveled shredded burnt stump is all I have left
Lying on the cold hard tile
Tear in my eye but still I've yet to die
Uncork the whiskey as I will need this
Upend the bottle - I will drink to my dead dick
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4. |
Slave To The Desk
01:55
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Get up - Shower off
My shame - Time to die
Again - Melt my eyes
Daily - Ritual
Comfort - In patterns
Emails - Fuck em all
Trying - To grow a spine
Get out - So I said
5 years - And still here
Will this - Ever end
I've been - Done for years
Paycheck - Requirement
The end of your days draws nearer and nearer
SLAVE TO THE DESK!
This desk chair: My ball and chain
Cursed to a chair
The end of your days draws nearer and nearer
SLAVE TO THE DESK!
AUTO PILOT TO THE GRAVE.
Get up - Shower off
My shame - Time to die
Again - Melt my eyes
Daily - Ritual
Comfort - In patterns
Emails - Fuck em all
Trying - To grow a spine
Get out - So I said
5 years - And still here
Will this - Ever end
I've been - Done for years
Worthless - Piece of shit
The end of your days draws nearer and nearer
SLAVE TO THE DESK!
This desk chair: my ball and chain
Cursed to a chair
The end of your days draws nearer and nearer
SLAVE TO THE DESK!
AUTO PILOT TO THE GRAVE.
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5. |
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Cursed by a plague of rotting undead food
Condemned to a life of burning indigestion
Eternally you upchuck all of your guts
Burning bile destroys esophagus
Eternally....
Internally...
Consuming antacids yet there will be no relief
Fiery rage within your stomach walls
Intestinal tract turned inside out and knotted
Digested alive your innards have now rotted
Eternally....
Internally...
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6. |
Bath Salt Alligators
01:23
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Fuckin'
Walking through the park
Eyes out for the narc
Hiding til after dark
Carrying the load
Not just some hater
My mission is greater:
Feeding alligators
Synthetic cathinones
To create the murdering
ultimate death machine
Bath Salt Gators!
Minds are fucking god damn fried
consuming humans to survive
Bath Salt Gators!
Never-ending killing spree
Advanced strength, integrity
Bath Salt Gators!
Tripping balls and murdering
Untouchable death machine
Bath Salt Gators Eating Humans
I feed them the salts,
Their eyes go blue and white
Purple from their ears
Red mist from their minds
Emerging from the waters
On two legs they now stand
Their final goal
Is to eat every human
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7. |
Fight Your Dad
02:40
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Deep in my den, I survive on mtn dew
Leveling my rogue and my mage
Keep curtains closed, I do not want to see the world
Fertile human females fuel my rage
Hey! Deadbeat!
You should do something besides
Beat your meat!
Get a job!
You are fucking 32 and
Still a huge slob!
I can take him
He is old
Time for payback
One thousand fold
Fight your dad!
Get out of the basement!
Fight your dad!
This is your house now!
Fight your dad!
Tried to make you pay rent!
Fight your dad!
Now this fucker’s going down!
Who’s a loser now
Not me
I will disavow
Family
How’s it feel? You’re done, no longer the king
You’ve been bested by your only spawn
Still, my lair, downstairs, brings comfort to me
I will not emerge until the dawn
Hey! Asshole!
Never beaten I still
Have control!
Still my house!
I regret having children
Now get out!
Fight your dad!
Get out of the basement!
Fight your dad!
This is your house now!
Fight your dad!
Tried to make you pay rent!
Fight your dad!
Now this fucker’s going down!
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8. |
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Open fans
Of concealed carry
Aroused by
The military
Economic
"Mastermind"
Fearful of
The foreign kind
Aggressively
Into standing
Swear allegiance
Or eat the lead
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9. |
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Come on down, gather round
To the fuckin' basement now!
Grab some beers, lose your fears
In a circle - run around
Mosh it up, moshing down
Mosh until you hit the ground
Getting hurt, lose your shirt and
MOSH WITH YOUR TITTIES OUT!
Cracking cold ones with the boys
The band is cranking golden noise
Another band another set
Mosh until you're fucking dead
Beers are gone and now you're wasted
Can't escape this fuckin' basement
There's only one thing left to do
MOSH WITH YOUR TITTIES OUT!
Come on down, gather round
To the fuckin' basement now!
Grab some beers, lose your fears
In a circle - run around
Mosh it up, moshing down
Mosh until you hit the ground
Getting hurt, lose your shirt and
MOSH WITH YOUR TITTIES OUT!
TITS OUT!
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10. |
Bill Scully Is A Dick
00:26
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Bill Scully's a fuckin' dick.
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11. |
GMOs Are Cool
00:42
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Over stuffed
we don't have enough
food for all
Only way
To fucking save
Humanity
Excessive rays
Climate change
Harvest razed
A better seed
To build - we must
Turn to science
In which we trust
Increase the yield and
Strengthen crops
GMOs
GMOs
GMOs
GMOs are really fuckin' cool
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12. |
Smashed into Liquid
02:02
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At the mall - surrounded by sheep
Mall rats and goddamn dweebs
Large earlobes and larger jeans
Searching for their worthless scenes
Descending
Landing plate
Gives way
Future corpses
Cannot be saved
Escalator to their grave
Platforms collapse exposing dangerous gears
Everyone facing their greatest fears
Bodies crunch as they all get twisted
They will be smashed into fucking liquid!
J
NCO Jeans caught
In the machine
Humans sucked in
Grinding steps
Rips flesh
Crushing bones
Bodies mesh
SMASHED
INTO LIQUID
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13. |
Public Intoxicator
02:59
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Public Intoxicator
How the fuck did I end up in jail
Public Intoxicator
No one knows I’m in here, no one’s paid bail
A cold bunk is all I get
There’s no place for me to shit
Living nightmare this is hell
People banging on the walls
Some guy has no clothes at all
I will die inside this cell
Lunch
Eat up
Fuck
This sucks
Sleep
Pass time
Freeze
Wait for
Someone to pay bail
Wake
Search town
Where’s
This clown
Make
Phone calls
To
Find out
This dick is a
Public Intoxicator
Get out just in time to play the show
Public Intoxicator
Time to get drunk
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14. |
Lethal Fecal Injection
01:14
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Force you to talk - I'll force you to die
Luer lock needle straight to your thigh
Entering femoral artery
Killing you slowly
Contents filled up with debris
From my rectal cavity
Boiled down to a degree
Of lowered viscosity
Lethal
Fecal
Injection
Dirt snake enters through the stab wound
Clogging veins impeding blood flow
Body fails to staunch the spread
Fever races to your head
Dizzying and draining
Eyes fogging and now fainting
Immunity now down and out
From your lowered white blood cell count
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15. |
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Fuck progress move backwards
Fuck
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16. |
Retox
02:13
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Full time intoxication starts to slow the brain
And I don’t mean get stupid I mean feeling lame
I don’t feel anything
That slug of beer that joint it doesn’t do the trick
My brain receptor’s off and then it starts to click
I took a break
Tolerance be damned its time to drink beer like a man
RETOX RETOX RETOX I’ve had enough
RETOX RETOX RETOX Let’s get weird
RETOX RETOX RETOX Life is rough
RETOX RETOX RETOX RETOX RETOX
Let’s drink some fucking beer!
Life in a constant state of fuzz and I know what I’m doing
Without drugs and drinking my life would be ruined
Can’t stop or I will die
RETOX RETOX RETOX I’ve had enough
RETOX RETOX RETOX Let’s get weird
RETOX RETOX RETOX Life is rough
RETOX RETOX RETOX RETOX RETOX
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17. |
One Man Mosh Pit
01:37
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Oh shit there he goes - IN THE PIT AGAIN
Running 'round in circles - WITHOUT ANY FRIENDS
He doesn't need a ring of flesh or even stomping beats
He just needs a single amp and shoes upon his feet
Guitar plugged in and feedback screams - HE RUNS AROUND THE PIT
Inappropriate timing - HE DOESN'T GIVE A SHIT
He moshes during soundchecks, he moshes in the queue
I saw him at mcdonald's - he moshed the playplace too
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18. |
Weedwhacker Nose Job
02:45
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Fuck
We'll see now who wins and who dies
While you're tied up to the tree
Engine revs as the line extends
And you cower under me
Dead grass spits into your face
Sticking with sweat onto your clothes
9.5 hundredths of an inch
Begins to slice into your nose
Suck on my line trimmer perversion
Otorhinolaryngological street surgeon
Your skin strips away like a baked summer squash
I laugh as your face turns into slosh
I cut through the rope now you're free to go
Your feet are intact but your head is no more
I stopped just shy of rib number three
leaving your torso soaked in gore
Weedwhacker Nose Job!
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19. |
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Cigarettes, smoked meat, cheeto dust, round-up
Aspartame, Fructose, corn syrup
Ammonia, fertilizer, pork chops, charcoal
Alcohol, cheez wiz, aerosol, Bleach
Bacon, Benzene, 1,3-Butadiene
Oil shale, walnut sawdust
X-Rays, radium, plastic, plumbum
Asbestos, Fuchsine, Stachybotrys chartarum!
WE'RE ALL GONNA GET CANCER
WE'RE ALL GONNA GET CANCER
WE'RE ALL GONNA GET CANCER
WE'RE ALL REALLY FUCKED!
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20. |
The Cast Iron Chef
02:15
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Late night alcoholic redemption
Culinary competition rejection
Pleas to quit falls on ears deaf
Through hatred create the ultimate chef!
By thunder and lightning
Beneath the moon
Wiring circuits
And cutlery
Pots and pans to form a man
A robotronic cooking fan
Programmed to cook, bake and boil
Runs on pure olive oil
The Cast Iron Chef!
In the iron kitchen
Turning up the heat
All six burners fired up
Never has been beat
No one cuts as fast as him
No one cooks so mean
Nobody can ever win
Against his pork n beans
Another night, another win
Continued victories
But no one ever could predict
The list of casualties
(An) error in the signal
Mistake - in the code
Frying of the motherboard
Caused him to explode
Grater in one hand six knives in the other
Attacking everyone in sight, slicing them like butter
Into the grinder go the humans, saves their skin for casing
Turning the handle, time for human sausage tasting!
His handles gleam
"Martha Stewart" they read
The last thing you'll see
Causing your death
THE CAST IRON CHEF
CAST IRON CHEF
CAST IRON CHEF
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