The Cast Iron Chef

from Garbage by Car Door Dick Smash

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    2018 album Garbage.
    Recorded/Mixed [poorly] by Car Door Dick Smash
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lyrics

Late night alcoholic redemption
Culinary competition rejection
Pleas to quit falls on ears deaf
Through hatred create the ultimate chef!

By thunder and lightning
Beneath the moon
Wiring circuits
And cutlery
Pots and pans to form a man
A robotronic cooking fan
Programmed to cook, bake and boil
Runs on pure olive oil

The Cast Iron Chef!

In the iron kitchen
Turning up the heat
All six burners fired up
Never has been beat
No one cuts as fast as him
No one cooks so mean
Nobody can ever win
Against his pork n beans

Another night, another win
Continued victories
But no one ever could predict
The list of casualties
(An) error in the signal
Mistake - in the code
Frying of the motherboard
Caused him to explode

Grater in one hand six knives in the other
Attacking everyone in sight, slicing them like butter
Into the grinder go the humans, saves their skin for casing
Turning the handle, time for human sausage tasting!

His handles gleam
"Martha Stewart" they read
The last thing you'll see
Causing your death
THE CAST IRON CHEF
CAST IRON CHEF
CAST IRON CHEF

credits

from Garbage, released December 21, 2018
Kegs

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Car Door Dick Smash Lafayette, Indiana

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